My question to you: Are you ready for some hardcore whining? Because honestly, I feel like I was just beat, head to toe, with a sack of hot nickles. Though I am not yet thirty, yet I feel a solid eighty years old. Allow me to paint you a picture people.
No cute pregnant lady am I. I have already gained 35lbs and expect to gain plenty more by the time this kid’s done a’cookin. What is that nerve that runs down your right side into your bum? Yeah, that one that shoots pain through my body when I move and makes me walk like a zombie from Night of the Living Dead? The psychotic nerve? What?
And what is up with this vile cold I’ve got going? This motha’s unleashed several restless nights on me regardless of the Tylenol Cold I’m all doped up on. And for the few hours I did get a little shut-eye last night, I was busy escaping snarky, secretive, sparkling vampires, which was perhaps even more exhausting than all the tossing and turning I was doing trying to get comfortable with this watermelon belly. Then I got really thirsty at about three in the morning and had to psychotic-nerve my way into the kitchen, running into walls, making noises like a creature from the dark swamp. I terrify small children. I’m a MONSTER!
This morning Avery and I had a ten minute argument about whether or not we had any bananas in the pantry. I don’t even know who won that debate. I put her in front of “The Lion King” and let it go.
There are women out there who make this look easy. There are women out there who can pull off being pregnant AND fully functional. I am glad that I can make those women feel really good about themselves as I lounge on the sofa in my pj’s like this sloth, only slightly less motivated and significantly less attractive, wishing we DID have friggin’ bananas in the pantry.
That moron Fred Durst, had it right when he so knowingly stated, “Its just one of those days”. Indeed it IS Fred. Indeed it is. Only 96 more days to go! Whoopidy-do!
One of Those Days
10 COMMENTS
LOL! (with you, not AT you).
Psychotic nerve? I have one of those too. It’s called “a pain in the butt.”
HA!
Come on, you KNOW that was funny…
… Okay, maybe not so much.
Sorry to tell you this, Di, but it’s only going to get worse. The third kid is a killer on the old body. Sorry about your cold! I’d make you some soup but I’m a pretty crappy cook and I’m quite sure that food poisoning isn’t something you need right now.
P.S. If you ever want to hear a good “pain in the butt” pregnancy story, just give me a call. I’ll have you feeling better in no time!
i’ve often broken the commandment ‘thou shalt not whine’ many atime while blogging. actually i think that’s what blogging is. whining. so you’re doing it perfectly, your writing makes me feel like i’m there right with you enduring the hope for energy but the reality of having none. blah! wait, i’m right here hoping for energy and not having any…the front desk at work is boring and i had to get all dressed up to sit here, i’d much rather be on my couch in pjs doing nothing or at least piling up the list of all the things i could have done IF i’d have the energy. what an endless cycle and psycho babble. here’s to wishing you all the best and that andy brings home some bananas after work.
Oh my goodness…you’re making me grateful for my 8 week stay in the hospital with my pregnancy. At least I didn’t have the psychotic nerve thing going on.
Wow DI, You make not being pregnant see like a dream!!
I am so glad that I am not the only woman that feels this way! I had two miscarriages last year and with each one I was not wanting to do anything I couldn’t even function and I had all my daycare kids to take care of on top of my little girls!!!
Hang in there when you have the baby it will all be worth it in and end and remember that we tend to loos the memories of being prego afterwards or I don’t think we would every get prego again!!!
I always feel pretty guilty for venting like this. Really, I ought to be grateful for my incredible blessings…its just hard sometimes to keep focused and be optimistic in the midst of feeling like crap.
Ohhh, . .that syadic (sp?) is the WORST!!! It was CRIPPLING during my last pregnancy. I mean, it would bring me to my knees and I’d bawl like a baby until the pain would pass. Get to the chiropractor. I went one trip and it fixed it for weeks! It was heavenly. Lay on your back, lift your leg up, and have Andy push your leg toward you, while you try to push it down toward him. Gradually let him push it higher and higher (as far as one can go with a basketball size belly out front). It’ll hurt at first, but will give you some relief. I feel for ya girl.
OK, OK, you don’t have to do this again.
I relent and won’t mention again that “having 3 is an odd number and you really should try for a boy”.
I can’t stand to have you be so miserable, my lovely little darling Precious.
MOM
Your mom is so sweet…
Di… I am only pregnant with my 2nd so I can’t tell you I understand but the gaining weight thing… I am so sorry… you poor girl… I am glad that you just want to sit on the couch all day I would for sure if I felt like that.
It’s so funny reading your blog because you haven’t changed a bit…. I can still picture you in my head doing that bit from Mad tv….
well hope you feel better and I know for sure who I can vent to now!